"Herenow chuck english and learn to pray plain."

(577.36-579.25)  We've got a fun (and fairly straightforward) passage today.  We begin with one of the parents wondering whether one of the children, presumably Jerry, is stirring.  He's fast asleep, though, and the sound was "only the wind on the road outside for to wake all shivering shanks from snorring."

The next two paragraphs identify HCE and ALP.  HCE, "Misthra Norkmann that keeps our hotel," is in his nightclothes.  "Hecklar's champion ethnicist," Mark calls him.  "He's the dibbles own doges for doublin existents!" notes Mark, highlighting the Dubliner's multiple iterations.  "But a jolly fine daysent form of one word.  He's rounding up on his family."  ALP is the "bodikin by him."  Mark calls her "missness wipethemdry," calling back to the way she soothed the crying Jerry earlier in the chapter.

They're on a marriage journey together and currently returning from "their diamond wedding tour," moving "under talls and threading tormentors, shunning the startraps and slipping in sliders, risking a runway, ruing reveals, from Elder Arbor to La Puirée, eskipping the clockback, crystal in carbon, sweetheartedly."  The remainder of the passage consists of a list of entertaining items, which Campbell and Robinson fittingly term "slogans."  I imagine these slogans could be posted in HCE's pub.  A couple of my favorites are:

• "Hot and cold and electrickery with attendance and lounge and promenade free."
• "Mind the Monks and their Grasps."
• "Hatenot havenots."
• "My time is on draught.  Bottle your own."

A fun one to unpack is, "Buy not from dives.  Sell not to freund."  McHugh notes that "dives" is Latin for "rich" and that this accordingly references the proverb of Sauvé that reads, "Sell nothing to a friend and do not buy from a rich man."  Of course, "freund" is not only German for "friend," but it's also very close to the name Freud.  McHugh explains that this phrase, then, can also mean, "Tell not to Freud," another joke by Joyce aimed at psychoanalyists (whom he had not time for).

The final slogan, which ends today's reading, is another memorable one:  "Let earwigger's wivable teach you the dance!"